It’s kind of crazy to think that this blog has been in existence for almost 3 years. It started as a personal project to help me battle depression and anxiety that became a senior project that taught me much about myself and shaped quite a bit of how I see the world now. I haven’t been posting much in the past year and a half after graduation, but all the things I sorted through senior year are still very much a part of my life and daily thinking. As some of you know, starting my etsy shop a few months ago brought some of my perfectionist tendencies out again, and I got a bit lost once again in letting my art and the reception of my art define who I am. Basically, my senior project to search for hope and fight my own perfectionism and insecurities and sort through what it means to be human is a continuing journey for me. It was a very rewarding experience for me to go through and share that process with you all through my senior project—ironically, when I was sharing some very personal thought processes with you I felt less dependent on what you thought of them and was able to really unpack a lot of my ideas and beliefs in a very beneficial way. I want to continue that now after graduation as well.
Right now in my life, that looks like writing more to help me process through what God is teaching me in my journey, and sharing it here whether or not it’s polished, and whether or not I’m able to complete it as an illustrated journal. I want to do more of those as well, but I’ve put off so many posts by thinking they have to be finished and perfect. I want to cut through some of that and just put it out there, to stop letting my art or what other people think define me and instead get my identity and value from God and give him the glory by using the talents and mind he has given me to learn more about him and his creation and my place in it.
So starting next week, I’ll be redesigning the look of this blog, and changing its vision to become more of a personal learning journey and less of a portfolio and plead for affirmation. I’ll be posting more unfinished sketches and thoughts in an effort to continue the learning process begun the summer of my senior year.